The truth about the belly

Before I tell you the "truth", I want to make a little acknowledgement. I want to acknowledge that although my posts this week have been about my pregnancy, I don't want my blog to turn into a "mommy blog" and I really don't envision that happening. Of course I'll talk about the pregnancy and the baby, but just like everything else in my life, I want balance. I want to keep voicing my opinions on controversial topics, telling the crazy stories of my life with LoLo, and posting cute pictures of Bronx. Ok end of acknowledgement.

Obligatory cute Bronx picture to prove I haven't forgotten him

So the truth about the belly. Honestly, I feel like I'm in an awkward spot. I've struggled with my weight ever since I left high school and the three sports I played year-round. And now, I'm supposed to gain weight and it's "encouraged". It feels weird. And ironically, I've actually lost weight since learning I was pregnant.

But what really feels awkward to me is when people find out I'm pregnant but then can't figure out if I have a belly because I'm starting to show or because it was always there. I'm not one of those cute little petite women whose belly is so flat that you can tell right when she starts to show. It's something I feel a little bit sad about sometimes.

Although when I look at myself in the mirror, I see pretty much the same body, but I've noticed that things have started to shift. Namely my belly. Last week, I had to leave the button open on my jeans for the first time. I even wore my maternity jeans for the first time (ummm why aren't jeans made like that in real life?? oh yeah, they're called Pajama Jeans).

To be honest, I haven't taken any pictures of myself since I found out I was pregnant. I feel like there's no point yet. I feel like I look the same. I feel like I want to wait until it's obvious that I'm pregnant.

Am I stupid for thinking this way? Will I regret it?

Radiant

Hey friends, I'm over on my sister's blog today for a series she started called "Radiant". It's a great little series throughout the month of February that highlights little moments in life when you can see love.

I know lots of you watch the show, "Parenthood". It got a mention in my post today because it reminds me so much of my family. My story is pretty intense, but it's a time I'll never forget. Come check it out.

How It Happened II

So when I left off yesterday, I had just told LoLo that we were having a baby. There was no way I would keep it from my family, so I wanted to try to get my mom, dad, and sister in the same place so that I could tell them also. So, in typical Erin fashion, I asked if they wanted to come over for dinner even though I don't really cook. Luckily, my mom brought stuff over and cooked for us. While she was cooking, LoLo came home from work and we decided it was time to tell them.

When I had gone to Rite Aid earlier in the morning, I had bought a card that had a picture of a martini on the front. On the inside, I wrote, "You might be needing a drink because you're going to be a grandma!"

My mom read it and was like, "What? Is this real???" (Apparently everyone thinks I'm some elaborate prankster who goes around making fake pregnancy tests and tells people they're going to be a grandparent as a joke.) My dad just kept saying "Oh God...I'm not ready for this." and my sister was like, "YES!!!! This is so awesome!!"

Later, my dad said to LoLo, "Wow LoLo, guess you've been pretty busy." Yep, thanks, P-Dids. Way to make it super awkward.

The next day was New Years Eve and somehow, we had agreed to have the party at our house. I had planned to just buy a bunch of frozen wings and some chips and dip and call it a day anyways, but then when I couldn't stay awake for longer than 10 minutes, it seemed like an even better idea.

Enter my sister. Party planning queen. (Seriously, check out her blog section on parties!) She and my mother showed up at our house with tons of snacks, cupcake mix, champagne and juice to make punch, decorations, and even party tiaras. My sister used a silver foil table cloth and made a runner out of wrapping paper. This party was officially taken to a whole 'nother level and laying on the couch was absolutely not an option. I pushed through to help clean the house (even though LoLo and my sister did a lot of it), make cupcakes, and make guacamole.

Here's the food table minus the food. Pretty cute, huh? We filled the hats with popcorn and chips!

I just wanted to lay on the couch all night, even though I was so happy to be around such great friends. We laughed so much and had so much fun, but all I could think of was my bed...and not spilling the secret.

A little New Years LoLo for you!

 After having such an incredible New Years and knowing what I knew about how much our lives would change this year, I knew that 2013 was going to be a year I would never forget.

How It Happened

Ok, this isn't really going to be a post about how it happened...because, well, I think you all know and if not, perhaps my father can help you with that (and make sure you read his comment on the post for even further explanation...his name is P-Dids).

But at least let me share with you the story of how we found out we were going to be parents. I had off the week between Christmas and New Years and spent most of that time at my parents' house since my sister was home for the holidays. My mother has always called me a slug because I'm pretty lazy and really enjoy a good day of sitting on the couch watching reality television. This week though, I just wanted to be on the couch with my eyes closed. All day. All night. At one point apparently I was snoring pretty loud which I don't usually do. I just couldn't get enough sleep. And I kept having to take really deep breaths. And I was taking tums like nobody's business. I knew something just wasn't right.

December 30, 2012, I decided it was far enough past when I was supposed to have my period and it was time to just suck it up and take a test. LoLo was at work and I had just come home from sleeping over at my parents' house. I was all alone (well, except for Bronx). I took the test and almost immediately, this is what came up:

Thank you for making the test bi-lingual. #aydiosmio

 I started freaking out. I was talking to Bronx like he was a person, saying, "Ohmygod Bronx, ohmygod Bronx, you're going to be a big brother!!!" (Psycho right?) I just couldn't believe it was true so I got in the car and drove to Rite Aid to get another test. When I brought the test up to the counter, the guy behind the counter was like "Oh wow! Good luck!! Is this your first baby? I have a daughter who's 4. I would recommend not having a daughter, they are crazy." Thanks for helping me not freak out, buddy. And like I have any choice in the matter.

I went home and took the second test. Same result.

Same shocking bi-lingual result

About this time, I was supposed to go to LoLo's work to have lunch with him. I put the tests in a plastic bag and threw them in my purse. I got in my car and started to back out of the driveway when I couldn't go any further. My car was completely stuck in the snow. My neighbor came out and was trying to help me get out, but he and I couldn't get the car to budge. I called my friends/neighbors Chris and Max and they came with big shovels and the 4 of us were finally able to get the car out after about 40 minutes of being stuck. It took everything I had not to tell Chris and Max my secret.

I got to the hospital where LoLo works and sat down with him in the cafeteria. I told him to close his eyes because I had a surprise. When he opened his eyes, the test was in front of him and he was like "Ummm is this real??" We basically sat there in stunned silence for the next 20 minutes.

Come back tomorrow for the story of how I told my family and how I nearly slept through a New Year's Eve party at my house the next day!

The biggest secret I ever had to keep

When my mother was pregnant with me, my father bought her a little pair of blue overalls for the baby. A few weeks ago, my father threw a plastic bag at me and LoLo. In that plastic bag was this pair of overalls for a six month old baby.

Have you guessed yet?

LoLo and I are having a baby! Baby Santana is due August 27, 2013.

This was one of the hardest secrets I've ever had to keep. Of course we told our families right away, but told very few others. It was so hard!  My sister has been going crazy waiting for me to announce it, so I guess it was hard for her to keep too.

I'll share the whole story later this week, but we are so excited now that we've gotten over the initial shock.

After all, it wasn't that long ago that I wrote this. And yes, I'm also aware that I totally jinxed myself. But like many people tell me, no time is the perfect time, so here we go!

A (wo)man's best friend

I talk a lot about Bronx, my 1.5 year old Yorkie puppy, here on this blog, but I've only dedicated one full post to the little guy since I started blogging. If you follow me on instagram (empiricallyerin) or twitter (@empiricallyerin), you have probably seen lots of pictures of little Bronx.

Busy Bee Bronx

 Before I had Bronx, I had no idea how much I could love an animal. I've never really been an animal person in general, even though our family always had a dog. I loved our dogs, but never really felt the way I feel about Bronx. 

I've told this story before, but when I went to choose Bronx from the breeder's house, I knew immediately that I wanted him. While his siblings were jumping and yapping, Bronx was laying calmly. His siblings were even rolling over him and he barely moved. He was so quiet and gentle, I knew he was perfect for me.

Bronx's first night at home

At the time that I got Bronx, I was less than a month away from being unemployed. I've talked before about my feelings while I was unemployed... I felt like I had no purpose, like I had no identity without my work.

Bronx was the one little ounce of happiness I carried during that time. Every morning, I had to wake up for him. I had to get out of bed to feed him. I had to get out of the house to walk him. If I hadn't had him, I'm sure there would have been many more late mornings lying in bed and many more days stuck inside.

The best little cuddler

And I know some of you will think I'm crazy, but Bronx has really strong intuition. I've heard people say that their pets can read them and know when something's wrong. If I didn't have Bronx, I'm not sure I'd believe them.

On my saddest, hardest days of unemployment, Bronx would always want to have a cuddle day. The other night, I was watching Parenthood and started crying during one of the episodes (come on, who doesn't?! That show has me crying EVERY episode!), and Bronx came running over to me and jumped on my lap and kept rubbing me with his face.

When LoLo had his old job where he was working 12-13 hours a day 5-6 days a week, Bronx was my buddy through it all. Bronx made me feel less lonely while I spent all of those long days without LoLo.

He loves cuddling with his toys and his blanket too!

 I truly believe in fate and I know that Bronx was put in my life for a reason. He has brought me so much happiness and has been the best little companion. I can't imagine what my life and especially my unemployment would have been without this little guy.

Always a professional.

Never a Dull Moment

On Monday evening, I drove into our driveway to find that LoLo had left his flashing lights on his car on. When I got into the house, I told LoLo and he went running out to turn them off. I also told him he should probably start his car to make sure the battery hadn't died, so he did and then came back in the house.

We had a fun night of watching our novela (yes, we're still watching the novela with the good looking Mexican man dressing as a woman to get closer to the love of his life...it takes a long time to gain the trust of a lady and then tell her you're not really a lady but actually the man who broke her heart months ago!). We went to bed pretty early because we've been pretty tired lately.

The next morning, we both had to wake up at the same time because I had to be at work early. As soon as we woke up, LoLo jumped out of bed and ran down the stairs yelling something along the way that I couldn't really hear or comprehend.

So I got up and went downstairs and yelled for him but he wasn't in the house.

A few minutes later he came back in and I said, "Ummm what did you say when you were running down the stairs?"

To which he replied (and I am trying not to die of laughter right now as I write this):

" I LEFT MY CAR ON!!!!!"

You may be wondering what he meant by that. Well, he meant that he left his car on. All night. For 12 hours. Because he forgot to turn it off after testing the battery.

*Cue thunderous laughter*

Yes, you read that correctly. My husband left his car on all night. Keys in it. Unlocked. RUNNING.

Thank God we live in Maine now and not the Bronx. That car would have been gone so fast...